I’ve always thought I’d had things going on in my head, I just was good as suppressing them. I’d have down days, feel depressed, not want to leave the house or do anything days.
I think it has started to come to ahead this year. During my first placement in ED in March/April I was doing only the things I HAD to do. I was cancelling bank shifts left right & centre. The bank team at the hospital didn’t like this so I was let go, thankfully I have other employment but that isn’t any better.
In June I stopped going to uni, I just wanted to be in my ‘happy place’ the gym. I would, however, carry on with my assignments and eventually start my second placement but did little else. The placement went well and I was waiting to start my HCA bank job at the new trust.
Placement ended on the 26th July and I eventually got onto the bank the following week. As I did an induction in June my official start date is June. Since finishing my second placement I have only worked two shifts despite having been booked on my many more. I’d leave the house in the morning, get almost there, then cancel the shifts. I was just going round in circles.
The thing is I can’t afford NOT to be working.
I had a great opportunity to work loads throughout August but worked three shifts in total!
Things really came to a head about a week ago, I didn’t know what I wanted to do or if I wanted to keep going, this is still being sorted out and the person involved is really a nasty person.
Thankfully I have a lovely support network at home, and I will get through this. I have pushed everything away for so long I can continue to do so for the foreseeable future.
On Monday I went to my very first CrossFit class but first I had my body scan done.
According to the scan, I am 89.4 kg (197 lb) with a body fat of 36.7%!!!! That is what one of my 2 scales at home says but still WTF. Even if it isn’t accurate at least it’s a number to improve on. Maybe my original weight of 203 lb was also wrong. I know I have lost weight so who really knows.
The results have me at a 6kg loss by 6th November. MY BMR was calculated as 1600 with my TDEE as 2241 and calorie in goal as 1700. My Fitbit has my average TDEE as 2249 and MFP had my calorie goal as 1730. So all inline with each other.
I have another scan in 3 months, then I aim to have 1 every year for the next few years until I get to goal.
My last 1-2-1 I worked on the Hang/Power Clean move. First using a dowl to work to break down the movement then onto a 7.5kg training barbell then to a 15kg bar with 10kgs.
I need lots of work on this move, like most people starting out. The hang positioning at the top, the hip thurst, all will come with time. I have a 6kg york barbell at home with 8kg of plates to work on it. I do feel at times it might be too light to fully engage with the movement but it is great to be able to practice whenever I want.
I had my second 1-2-1 on Wednesday, I wanted to die! Warm up then got working on presses to find out my 3RM. I’ve never been good with this exercise, I have no arm strength.
vs strict press
I started with 15kg bar for the strict press, moving to 20kg then 25kg then 30kg. Couldn’t get 3 reps with 30kg so moved back down to 25kg with is now my 3RM. For the push press, I started with 25kg which I found easy-ish. 30kg is my 3RM.
The class ended with The Ladder – 250-meter row; 15 kettlebell swings (12kg), 25 burpees, 15 kettlebell swings (12kg), 250-meter row. The burpees OMG the burpees, I needed so many breaks to complete them, oh how I hate them! Needed to rest halfway through the 2nd lot of KB swings and at the start of the last row but with encouragement from the coach I managed to complete it in 12 min flat.
Once the class was over I had a little while to wait for the bus, 20 mins to be exact. Here is where I throw up any water I had drunk in the session, the short bus journey was so lovely just trying not to throw up again lol.
I managed to get home and have 2 hours rest before going out for the rest of the day & evening.
I’ve taken the plunge and joined my local Crossfit box. Looking forward to seeing my progress not just in weight loss but in strength too. I have currently gone for a 2 class a week plan as I just can’t commit to more at the moment.
The box starts new ‘athletes’ in the Academy. This includes a body scan + 3 1-2-1 classes to get used to the movements. I haven’t had the scan yet as wifi was down that day.
I will do a post of my scan results once I’ve done it. So far I’ve gone through front & back squats. Front squats I don’t like due to hand placement, my wrists hate me,
Hopefully, I will continue to log my journey to a better me